Silence is Acceptance

Yes, I confess I am a blogger delinquent! It has been a while since I've posted, but I think the longer I'm away the more I have to share,and hopefully the better the posts......quality over quantity. So I share only what truly provokes my thought, inspires my conversations, and of course, aggravates me tremendously...

So with a clear conscious, I share with you, what started out as friendly banter, and escalated into a heated debate.

Now, before I even get into it the gist of the argument, how many of y'all believe that the average person whether they'd like to admit it or not can be coaxed into just about anything at the right price.Before you say that's not you, think about that particular lifestyle, career, or dream salary, that you would love to have. How far would you go to it? How much would you put up with?



Few days ago a friend of mine, shared an observation he had made about me. He said, "you know, I notice you have a problem with accepting authority or simply being told what to do". (Mind you, he probably only arrived at this, because I always do the opposite of whatever he asks, but either way he was correct.)Not a groundbreaking observation. Anyone who knows me will tell you, I have problems being told what to do, but really? Who doesn't? Now I definitely don't pride myself on disobedience, however I especially dislike authority communicated in manners that appear threatening, berating, offensive, abusive.... you get the picture. JUST PLAIN DISRESPECTFUL

I don't harness the belief respect is always earned. All people, in my eyes are deserving of respect at the outset of any relationship, unless proven otherwise. Too idealistic? Maybe, but just because you have something I could potentially benefit from does not mean, that I now owe you my life!

Anyway all this said, and my friend felt that this mindset could prove harmful to me at some point and time in my life. I agreed there will be times when I will be forced to entertain people, even my superiors who might challenge me in these areas, and I will have to learn how to respond accordingly.

Argument so far? Cool. I agree.


My beef and where the cleavage in our arguments began (at least for me) was the amount of disrespect one should allow, if any to maintain that lateral movement. I mean, should I have to be treated poorly, to earn that promotion. I'm not sure I have to. If you were being berated, humiliated or subjected to ill treatment at your workplace by the "trusted" hands of a superior, would you put up with it if you knew that major promotion was at hand? My response? Heck, no! At this point he began shaking his head, which I resented by the way.



In some regard I saw a bit of his point, I mean if you wait it out and get that promotion, you would have gained some bargaining power maybe enough to position yourself, to make some change.


But, of course the argument does not end here. It was at the mercy of our two, egos at this point. Anyway he throws what he thought I guess was a few clever variables into the equation. He says, so what if, you had a family of four, a mortgage and other looming responsibilities, and this job of ten years was your only reference. What would you do? I was like... Really!? (With little to no sarcasm.) Of course, based on this I am forced to weigh my options more seriously. So, I said yes, I probably would tough it out.

But, being me, I had to add some variables of my own..... What if, every time your boss asked you to do something he wasn't just derogatory he threw in some racist commentary along with it? What would you do then? Would you still run and grab that coffee, for the sake of your promotion. Some, might say, yea laughing all the way to the bank, which I think was the point, my friend was making. At the end of the day, he felt like his needs were still being met, but were they really?

If you were employed at a billion dollar corporation, rubbing shoulders with let's say the Donald Trump’s of the industry, everything was perfect, except the fact that in order for you to secure that major promotion you had to endure the sexual exploits of your superior on a day to day basis until that great day. What would you do?

Again, the objection was, I am relating two completely different situations. Really though? Would you allow yourself to be referred to as an N*****, for that executive suite with a window just because it overlooked the city? Ladies would you perform those sexual favors under that office desk, or take that little slap on the derrière every so often in exchange for that six figure income?

What is your price?

I say, anything that compromises your integrity, your personhood, and your collective self worth, anything that compromises what has come to define you, cannot be purchased. There is simply no dollar value. I would rather be poor, yet rich with dignity than rich with little to none.

I don't know, I think we need to ensure we are accessing the right positions and opportunities, but not at the risk of compromising important values. It’s a hard debate!

Do you beat them at their own game, so to speak by "playing" the role 'til you make it to the top, and then change the rules? Or do you try to change the rules as you go along?


I don’t think every battle is to be fought, my faith instructs me to believe that the battle is not always ours it rests with the Sovereign God, yet had Rosa Parks on December 1, 1955 not disobeyed the bus driver orders, refusing to vacate her seat for that white passenger, we would not be able to celebrate the triumphs of the Civil Movement as we have.


Silence is acceptance people!


Just my 0.02

NDG signing off......